In connection with the deepening political crisis, as well as the completely visible and with the naked eye lack of leaders and leadership, as well as in accordance with the extreme necessity in the next Bulgarian parliament to get the real people, those who have a clear ideological and political profile and can finally sacrifice their lives /entirely/ in the name of the Fatherland, we hereby announce that we offer entry into the next parliament to anyone who wants it.
The requirements are simple:
1. It is desirable that the candidates for leadership have about 2000 words of their own vocabulary, the rest we will build on.
We should especially emphasize that this requirement is only so that the new leader can shine against the background of the existing political class. Otherwise, 1000 words will be enough for the initial implementation of the political project.
2. It is also desirable that they have some relatively clear idea of which part of the political space they wish to belong to. But given the recently spread theory “there is no right, there is no left”, this is not a mandatory requirement.
Because of the crowding of the center and the national niche, those interested would do well to find a relatively clear definition of their understanding of politics, which of course we will help them do by making them complete a short test, the answers to which will clearly show where they belong in the souls si.
However, this internal belonging is not necessarily reflected in the ideology of the project. On the contrary, projects that are completely foreign ideologically to their creators are more profitable, because in this way there is an opportunity for “growth in motion”, something that the public appreciates very much.
3. It is good for candidates to be able to make up their own minds about the shape of the earth, chipping, chemtrails, prophecies, and the existing geopolitical reality, but it is not required. If you don't have your own conspiracy theory, but you think you need one in your political role, don't worry, we will choose you, and for a special fee, we will create one for you, your own.
4. It is important that the candidate is morally elevated! Moral superiority over the people of the current political environment / and over the population / is a huge advantage. Family values, respect for elders, life for the sake of future generations, praise of ancestors and the whole arsenal of moral-patriotic, renaissance-cultural norms is one of your main weapons.
In the event that in the course of your political activity, after landing in the parliament, you are caught in violation of one or some of these norms, you should not worry at all. We are here to fix what happened. Naturally, as part of a future management contract.
Creative!
1. We will give you such a name that everyone will envy you. In it will be woven both your personal superior qualities and the historical memory of our heroic people, with a hint of your future great deeds.
2. The brand sells the product! Your brand will be the most magnificent and meet the high expectations of our suffering people
3. Your “stage” behavior will be brought to perfection, and your manifestations in conventional and social channels will radiate only and only the strength of a person in whom other people can fully trust
4. Your advertising materials will be of the highest quality and highest impact, and the price-quality ratio will be optimal. You will get everything to be proud of.
Leave the technical details to us!
Due to some restrictions in the Bulgarian constitution, candidates have to apply through parties, which sounds boring and unfashionable, but unfortunately, if we have to fight the constitution, we will have to comply with it first.
If, of course, the candidates are having difficulties with the legal elements of creating a party, and the approaching elections are pressing us for time, you have no problems – we will provide you with a mandate holder, under negotiable conditions, so that you can realize your rising political ambition in the upcoming elections.
In order to comply with the rules (such as they are, because after our appearance we can change them completely) it is necessary to hold various meetings, collect all kinds of signatures and write down some statutes and bodies, but of course, you should not worry. All of this will be done for you with little to no input from you.
Our services will carry out all the necessary actions, you just have to sit back and wait for the successful landing of the project in the Bulgarian parliament.
Due to the recently intensifying “splitting” in cational parties, we suggest the selection of like-minded people so that the halo of the leader is guaranteed, and the accomplices are selected so that any chance is excluded.
For the purposes of this endeavor, we will create an Excel spreadsheet to measure integrity / we admit that the idea is “stolen” from an existing political party/, so that everyone, before being accepted into the “leader's bosom” to be verified in an unquestionable manner.
Also, there are practices that have become established in politics, such as signing the document for leaving the party together with the one for entering the party, so as to absolutely guarantee the upcoming and long period of time and then the loyalty of the accomplice.
We also have the complete toolkit to ensure the one-person / two-person in case the candidate has a favorite of his/her party member/ the leader's power over his associates and we guarantee that until the complete winning of power in the country, this mechanism will be flawless.
However, after coming to power, other mechanisms are often activated, which means that if “care” us for the leader and his leadership must continue and after that, he will have to sign an additional contract and many additional conditions.
However, our personal experience and capabilities are so great that it is very likely that the client will quickly find himself in the highest government position, therefore the scale and our actions must be described in advance and for the next stage, as well as the financial conditions for this, second stage of the activity.
Financial conditions:
In connection with the demonstrated tendency of founders and figures of Great Parties to receive the party subsidy, and based on the fact that this will most effectively measure the result of our consulting efforts, we propose that the payment be in the amount of half of the party subsidy for the first 6 months after the entry of the formation into the parliament.
This is essentially a form of payment of success fees, that is, payment according to the results achieved, so that the more MPs the formation acquires, the more the consultant will receive as remuneration.
The technical costs for the implementation of the project “landing in the parliament” are at the client's expense, and their scale depends on the number of MPs that the client wishes to land in the parliamentary hall.
You can trust us completely. If you don't know who we are, ask and they will tell you.
P.S. We ask for serious applicants only, because as you understand the pool of characters is large. But…. Bring your money and we will serve you!
That last one is a quote, if you know who, don't ever call me. We don't need such experts.
The comment was published on the author's Facebook page