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Sharing your home with a stranger: how they do it in Germany

Six million adults in Germany live alone in households and in unnecessarily large homes. At the same time, they feel lonely.

Dec 3, 2024 08:33 107

Sharing a shared home is a way for seniors to make use of extra space. At the same time, it helps against loneliness.

Heike Shenkut is trying to make this a reality, writes ARD. Since her two children moved out and her husband died suddenly, the 61-year-old woman has been living alone and looking for a roommate. She has printed classified ads with her name and phone number looking for a roommate for her big house with a garden. To protect herself from potential detractors, Heike gives her maiden name - after all, she lives alone in a big house.

The woman has been looking for a roommate for a whole year. She says she doesn't have the heart to sell the house she and her husband built together. However, she cannot adequately care for her alone in the long term. So far, Heike has had three interested candidates. "One was a therapist like me and she would have been a good option," the woman told ARD. However, the two could not understand each other. According to Heike, many elderly people cannot get used to the thought of having to move into a shared home with another person and share everything.

"When you are older you have a world view and you don't compromise,” says Heike. She has practically split her house in two. Her idea is for everyone to have their own bedroom and bathroom, and for the kitchen and living room to be shared.

More and more seniors are looking for shared housing

There is no exact data on how many shared apartments elderly people live in - mostly because there is no way to be sure if two people with different surnames are not living in a partnership. However, the German Guardian Council for the Elderly estimates their number in Germany at 2,000.

There are even platforms on the Internet now, such as "Bring Together", where you can find suitable roommates. The fact is that demand is increasing. According to a survey, 40% of people over the age of 45 can imagine spending their old years in a shared apartment.

Among them is Heiko Ziverling from Braunschweig, we read further in the ARD publication. A few years ago, he and his wife decided to move into an apartment with another couple. They spent a little more than a year together. After one separation and one death, in the meantime, only the two men remained in the shared home.

The greatest potential for conflict is in the kitchen or bathroom, Ziverling assures. And his roommate Dirk Schlinkert advises to discuss the problems that have arisen immediately, instead of building up tension that will one day erupt, he told the public media.

Six million people over 65. they don't have a partner

According to the data of the Federal Statistical Office in 2022. about six million older people over 65 lived alone in a household. That's one in three people in that age group.

For 61-year-old Heike Schenkut, it is unacceptable to live alone for a long time. In addition, she sometimes finds it difficult to tolerate silence. "I know a lot of people in the neighborhood who are in a similar situation,”, she says. "Women just live longer and suddenly find themselves with an empty and too big house.”

Heike Shenkut still does not lose hope that he will find a suitable roommate. She must be active like her and between 50 and 70 years old. "If I don't find someone soon, I will probably have to sell my beloved house,” says the woman.